Certified Poem Addict

guard my heart, shield my soul
oh my dear self, keep thy control
as the pain ascends
and bursts out in the open
guard my heart, shield my soul
please my dear self, keep thy control

hope may have left, and you in bereft
your invincibility had already been patent
so smile amidst the inevitable dire
eventually you'd get through the wire



1707moveon112108fr

as these regrets chase me in the darkness
i wait for the rain to come and wash me
as i save myself from this foolishness
i wonder if i can still reclaim the sanity

so let the rain fall despite the silence
it is its tour de force in this broken world
let the rain fall and revert my existence
so that from these odds I would be hurdled

another cycle, another history repeating
yet the learning has never been grasped
perhaps the reason for my heart breaking
when will the yearning be clasped?

hush, my rain; yes my dear, hush
it was not my intention to fall to the trap
yes dear rain, i will refrain from being slush
just help me get out from this mishap

it's the quarter now and i have to calm down
it is no use drying my eyes with these tears
i should let go of the hurt and get rid of the frown
it's time to burn now the hopes and the fears

so where do i go and what should i do?
these are the questions i prefer to unshackle
i have gone tired of the blue
i am now leaving the pinnacle


171414rain'squarter110731

Raincheck please, raincheck.

As this head of mine are filled with questions,
Slowly I am devoured by my self-preservations.

Thus here I am beseeching thee an inquiry:
If affection and destiny would not coincide,
I ask thee --- where dost thou think I should abide?

As I let these tears of mine wash away yours,
Would you care to accompany me in this course?
But why is it that you are fading away from me,
Tell me, is this really how it should meant to be?

Oh no! You just did not know ---
Thoughts of you are now imprinting a smile on my face,
A memory which I don't think I can dare to erase.
It may be so senseless, yet I think it would be my grace -
To be with you, together with me, in that sweet embrace.

But raincheck dear, I beg thee raincheck.
Why am I retreating, I can sense a coming wreck.
I can hear it within, I can hear it loud and clear,
My cynicism's surfacing inflaming the fear.
Oh why, oh why? 'Tis horror is chasing me.
I wonder if I can bear it; let me see, let me see.

With these vexations, I pause and I stop.
I don't think it's possible, I fall and I drop.
Was it you, was it me, or was the feeling just a fancy
It's time for me, I guess, to let go of this fantasy.
So I decided to walk towards my solitude,
Praying and wishing for my own fortitude:
Sooner or later, I will be granted beatitude.

As I trudge alone this rocky journey,
Along the road I have found a key.
At first I was wounded then I was terrified,
How could I ever abandon the little of my pride?
So I asked for Death to be mine for a while
So that I can be freed but not from this life
Liberated from the assumptions that I've been breathing for this time
Assumptions that will surely bring me to my own demise

With messed up thoughts and messed up emotions
I am too ashamed to look at my ruined reflections
I have committed a crime which is too grim for mercy
A crime I have committed which now pulls me back to misery
So this is the phase where I hate myself much
How could I ever concede with the touch?
I have betrayed myself, an act so deleterious
An embarassment that is too grave and serious
Oh no! This is too dangerous!

So raincheck dear, raincheck.
Lest my body will be laid down on that tormented deck.
I plea for the rain to come and be hurry
For only the rain can wash away this idiocy.
As I gather myself from this tremendous fall,
I am now more aware that I can't really have it all.
It's sad, true, absolutely catastrophic!
But no, no --- there will never be a magic.
To my fateful life, save me but not from the tragedy
But from the certainty of my preordained folly.


214805Raincheckforandtwenty110727

This fleeting sensation
Although very shallow
Has cast a confusion
With a very great blow

Despite the complexity
I proceeded unguarded
Hence the melancholy
I, myself, inflicted

What an obvious end!
What a pitiful tragedy!
Nothing new in the trend
Thus the same misery

So I pray for the rainfall
Wash away the stupidity
I just think I stand tall
And reclaim my dignity


122732shame180211br

I know..
'twas just a dream,
and nothing but a dream...
and soon it'd go.

It's funny...
but life is like that,
really like that..
a world of parody.

Looking back...
it's already the past,
and will always be the past...
no need for sidetrack.

Go ahead...
no need to worry,
there's no need to worry...
everything's in good stead.

Just remember...
you'll never be forgotten,
will never be forgotten...
not even in forever.



0026444ever102707

it's November once again
it was way back when
the heart was filled with love
and it couldn't seem to be enough

but when December's coldness came
Forever was cut short then became
the heart was filled with pain
there was laughter in the rain

when the dream turned into reality
there was pureness in felicity
when the reality turned back to nightmare
the heartache was too much to bear

as the ache seems to disappear
everything is becoming to clear
letting go is the only way
for the memories to stay

i seek no more for veracity
leaving it to mystery
a thought i wish to remain
as i go along with the most wonderful pain

0418memory181109br

the riddle of resolution
left me one question
was it worth the risk?
marked by brisk

the wonders of romantically inclined
with their emotions declined
was it the work of magic
that led them to tragic

wandering souls then lovers
she cries while he quivers
yet it was not enough
for it could be a bluff

the pain, i reckon
might be the reason
that holds them
in their stem


0324amazed181109dr

your cold shoulders
giving me the chills
your replies in terse
undoing all the seals

you have pulled the trigger
now you are holding back
you left me to hover
until i finally lost track

or

could

it

be

that...


my cold shoulders
gave you the chills
my replies in terse
have undone the seals

but i tried to reach out,
yet you make me felt unseen
i have even let go of the doubt
hence, my pain is very keen

so i wish...

for the rain to fall
to heal my heart
to lose it all
for a brand new start

so for the moment...
i will just...

drop a tear
to wash away the pain
embrace the fear
until i meet the rain

goodbye sweet love
'til then
goodbye dear love
never again

i drop
rain fall


185221strainfall210309

i wonder...

love, are you real?
if so, then why can't you make me feel?

your beauty, your marvel
your channel to forever
your infinity, your sublimity

love, please help me to hold on
i don't want to let you go
but i have been hurt many times
and tears had been falling from my eyes

love, i know you are real
although i can hardly feel
i am afraid,
i am losing my grip
this flimsy thread, i cannot keep

my heart's been bleeding
i wish i could make it stop
but it just can't
just can't
i am slowly fading
my faith is slowly vanishing

love, when will you sweep me off my feet?
when will you let my dreams come true?
when will i found you...
i know i have misunderstood you
a lot of times
false alarm, canny traps
and i keep on falling, and falling

would you care to console me?
take me away from this seclusion
i am tired, i am weary
please come and comfort me...
will you please...
have mercy...
just for once...
give my heart a chance...

my desparation, my isolation
i don't mean to be like this
but i can no longer contain their expectation
i know happiness lies only in me
i know that it is a decision
but i can't decide for it...
i can't, i just cant
i have to see you first,
and feel you first...

i wish i could just be a pessimist...
or just be a stoic...
let my heart be numb...
let all my tears run dry...
i no longer want to exist
cause i don't think i can resist
your power, your supremacy...
love, i know you are real...
and it's sad cause i can't feel you still
fairytales do come true, but mine just can't make through...




260107desparate1248yo

Dear Diary,
I was crying in my sleep last night
Someone broke my heart and i can't think right
I should have known I've been fool from the start
Now my world has fallen apart

Dear Diary,
I've been thinking of him everyday
He blocks my memory in every way
People began wondering if i am okay
I fake a smile and pretended to be gay

Dear Diary,
I couldn't believe this is happening to me
I haven't even seen him in my reality
How could this be, please help me please
My mind and my heart couldn't be at ease

Dear Diary,
I am now throwing my tears away
Yet the pain remains and forever it will stay
The anguish and agony is killing me softly
And it's just so sad cause my suffering he couldn't see

Dear Diary,
I have realized that i have to let go
Even though it hurts me but my heart needs so
I have cried a river and my tears seem to linger
But i know i'll be okay for forever's not forever

Dear Diary,
The rain's been pouring for a week now
And this time i am ready to take my bow
The show is over and i have to move on
I know it would be hard but i have to carry on

Dear Diary,
I heard Nina singing a song for me
"Someday, someone's gonna love me
The way i wanted you to need me
Someday, someone's gonna take your place
One day, i'll forget about you
You see, i won't even miss you
Someday, someday"
And now, i am set for a new day



090107diarist1425br
171207revised1122da

the rain fell
as i fell
'twas a mistake
for heaven's sake

stupid cranial
on denial
realization occured
cardio injured

the sky cried
i died
a tear dropped
hand cupped

false alarm
lonely swarm
face beamed
unskimmed

rainendleofan1810060151

i had picked my heart on the ground
and tried to mend its broken part
it was not easy, it was not sound
i can't even think of where to start

as i struggled putting back all the pieces
you passed by and lent me a hand
i was delighted, joy was ceaseless
i had returned to fairyland

i became oblivious of the world behind me
i have forgotten my reality
i was led to believe you are my destiny
unknowing my mirages would bring forth new misery

then sadness and tears began to visit me
you shouldn't have come, you shouldn't have befriend me
my nights became sleepless and the moon became my company
i should've been cautious for loneliness had once more caught me

how silly of me i had misinterpreted your great concern
i was not aware, you only came to show your care
i should’ve been more careful, I should’ve just locked my heart inside an urn
how could i not remember, this world was never fair!

and so the night turned to morning
but the morning turned to night
i didn't see that it was coming
now am back in the same plight

so silently, i picked my heart on the ground
under the rain, i tried to mend the broken part
i knew it wouldn't be easy for it was not very sound
i can't even think, i don't even know where to start




reckless060706